Why I could never be a Postmaster

Well, actually, there are a number of reasons, but here’s a good one- I couldn’t handle dealing with people like the ones in Manhattan, Illinois, who are circulating a petition to have the local Postmaster removed. What did she do wrong? She told a couple that their mailbox was on the wrong side of the street. Now that may be an annoyance, but it hardly seems like a firing offense, does it? Well the thing is, these folks don’t have just any old sheet metal or (heaven forbid!) plastic mailbox. No, no- they have a $900 brick mailbox. I would guess that $900 brick mailboxes are not very easy to relocate once they’re installed. After all, for $900, they must be huge. According to the “GoBrick! Cost Calculator“, the average cost of a brick used in bulding a house is about 75 cents (including labor). So $900 would buy 1200 bricks! I’m sure these are really nice bricks, artistically arranged and all, so maybe there aren’t 1200 bricks in their mailbox, but still!

The homeowners say this is ridiculous- “Now we have a $900 planter in front of our house”! Imagine! A $900 planter! Who would have a $900 planter? Now spending $900 for a wicked nice, wicked big, wicked heavy mailbox I can understand, but a planter? Get serious.

But wait- there’s more- what kind of couple spends $900 on a brick mailbox, and regards it as their constitutional right to have it on whatever side of the road they choose? If you guessed “former postal workers”, you got it!

Petition: Fire Manhattan’s postmaster
Joliet Herald News

(You can also view the online petition: Replace Manhattan Illinois Postmaster Now)

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